I was chatting with a friend tonight about my new partner, and he asked me how I came by him. I remember the moment clearly.
I was walking home late on a Saturday night, feeling totally content, looking up at the stars and feeling great. I had had a fun party and enjoyed it, and I wondered what was next in a vague sort of way…
Suddenly I felt a short list of essential qualities I wanted in a partner arise in me, and as I walked home, I softly said them aloud to myself, gazing up at the stars as I strolled through the cool evening.
And then it “clicked.”
I felt a distinct, subtle, almost unconscious shift in me. I loved my night and my life, and I now wanted someone new to enter it. It was as if I had opened up to a new possibility. Within two weeks I was with my new partner and very happy.
I am grateful for my friend for asking me how I went about it, because in retrospect a few things become clear.
Manifesting someone or something isn’t a step by step process. It isn’t just the “click” when it finally becomes realized and is on its way. Nor is it some hard or difficult thing. It is just a part of life. So what can be said about it at all?
Here’s my rough sense of it:
We always believe in something. Even believing in nothing – nihilism – still implies a feeling or state of belief. When something manifests, we have moved into a new state of belief… that is why the feeling change is so distinct a “click”.
So the key factor is in the question “How does one come to believe?” and to this there are three steps.
“Coming to believe” in something new is a word by word description of the process:
Coming – we turn up, are engaged with our day’s work and our life, and feeling fulfilled knowing we’re doing our best.
Coming to – we have “come to”, as in become awake. We are awake to choice and possibilities for what we want to unfold. It is not a search or a way of looking, it is simply being awake and aware in a very light, open way.
Coming to believe – we don’t just moodmake ourselves to believe by chanting affirmations or visualizing crazily. We don’t fake believe by “acting as if”. We just turn up, become awake, and let belief happen on its own.
By coming to believe that a new thing or person is possible, it tends to be attracted to us. It’s as simple and as complex as that!